Oh hello! Yes, we are still alive. It's been a challenge to get online at all, let alone write a blog post (or 2 or 3). I have barely gotten bills paid!
But Maddie hits 3 weeks old tomorrow, and we are slowly falling into some sort of routine. How do you actually get a routine going, by the way? Someone give me some tips, please.
Oh, right. Birth.
So my birthing experience was interesting, to say the least. I started having contractions Sunday evening. Finally at about 2 am we went to the hospital. They kept me for 2 hours and released me. I had progressed between the doc appointment on Thursday (1 cm) to 3 cm, but in those 2 hours nothing changed. Boo. Mike stayed home Monday, but went back to work on Tuesday. The contractions never really stopped, and finally got intense enough to go back on Tuesday. I called everyone in around 2:15 (my mom and Mike) and we were at the hospital by 4. At 4 pm I hadn't progressed since Sunday (still at 3 cm). They kept me an hour before making any decisions. Miraculously in that hour I went from 3 cm to 5. YAY! Baby is coming! I was admitted.
And then from 5 pm to 12:30 am, nothing changed. My contractions weren't intensifying or coming any faster, I wasn't dialating. So the doc came in and asked me to make a choice- go home, break my water, or start pitocin. I was trying to go without meds, and I certainly wasn't going home, so I opted for breaking my water. THAT was interesting. And let me tell you- contractions BEFORE the water breaking- nothing compared to after. HOLY WOW. It didn't take long and I opted for the Nubane.
Nubane is a trip. I rested through the pain for a few hours. 4 am came and I was checked again- STILL no change!!! At this point I have been laboring for 12 hours at the hospital and I was still just at the beginning of active labor??? WTH?!?!?
So despite any plans of mine, pitocin it was! However, the nubane was wearing off, and I was afraid of pitocin intensifying that pain, so... epidural it was. I got the epidural around 4:45 am. The pitocin was started around 5:15 am.
Everyone had gone home around 11 pm except Mike. He was napping on the loveseat. My mom stayed at my house and came back around 5:30 am. Which is good, because when the nurse checked me at 5:45 am I was at 9 cm!!!! Apparently SOMETHING worked.
So we woke Mike and he made the calls to everyone. Time became a blur at this point, but a little while later they came in to change out the internal monitor on the baby's head- it was all over the board for readings. So the nurse goes to change it out, and sees that the old monitor had fallen off because oh wow, baby's head is RIGHT THERE! And it's full of hair, which is why the readings were so bad.
So all of a sudden things are set up and the doctor was called in and I'm pushing before I knew what was happening. Didn't take long at all- she arrived at 7:19 am.
7 pounds 1 ounce
20 inches long
full beautiful ROUND head of hair
Absolutely perfect.
I must say that delivery was the easiest part of the whole pregnancy. And I'm recovering just as nicely. The epidural was definitely the right choice for me. The nurse said that the epi is probably what jump started my labor- they barely got any pitocin in my system at all.
And Mike? He was such a champ. Such a good labor coach- very supportive. He made it all the way to the end, heard it's a girl, and THEN nearly fainted. My poor family- they were all out there waiting to hear girl or boy. The hospital plays Braum's lullaby over the hallways when a baby is born, so they knew she was here. And then they had to wait 45 minutes before the doctor would let Mike get up and go tell them!
I think I'm going to go insane.
Already. I'm just not the "stay at home" type of person. Or rather, I am. I just like to have stuff to do, and to be honest I'm not quite in shape to be "to-doing" it up around here. But we're trying.
I finished the bib. With the except of adding on the button. Because I don't have buttons. But we are going to a fabric store tonight so my mama can make my nursery curtains, and I plan on stocking up on some extra bright and extra big and extra adorable buttons tonight.
I also made a pot of homemade chili last night. MMMMMMM it was so good. And so fitting for this fall weather that I have recently fallen in love with. I can have windows open. It's been YEARS since I could do that! Last year, we didn't have functioning windows/screens. Mike has since fixed that. All the college years before that- it wasn't safe on campus to keep windows open. Before that? I had a bird. It has literally been since my first year at UC, or maybe even my senior year of high school since I've been able to freely have my windows open. And my first year at UC- it was one dinky window in a tiny dorm.
Oh, chili, you say? I love my chili. I will look for the recipe today to see if I've ever posted it. I don't think I have, since I've been working on perfecting it for a while. I finally think I have it to where I like it, though. And since it's chili, it's high protein, high veggies, and LOW CARB! Meaning very good for the gestationally diabetic. The cornbread that goes with it? Not so much...
I also started one of my organizational projects- Organizing my bookcases! I'm already not happy with it, to be honest. Who wants to come help? There are a few constraints that are really bugging me, and I'm just not sure how to work around them and keep things aesthetically pleasing. This whole room needs the furniture rearranged, though... Maybe that would be enough to fix my woes. I'm just not sure how! Maybe if I draw the room and furniture proportionally from a 2D view from above... that might help me out. Hmmmm....
Other things I've done, because apparently this blog is now going to be a play-by-play of maternity leave? I walked a mall for an hour and a half.
And then after eating chili for dinner and sitting on an exercise ball, along with walking a flight of stairs every time I needed to pee, I spent about 4 hours awake with contractions in the wee hours of this morning.
I'm seriously hoping these things get a little more serious around here. Practice is really cramping my style.
Friday marked the beginning of the end. Or at least I hope.
(Pregnancy DOES in fact end, right????)
I started maternity leave. Which seems weird to me. It's been a long time since I didn't have a job. Ok, it was 2008, and again it was for a medical reason (knee surgery, anyone?) but outside of that awful time, it's been a while. And holy cow, 3 months? More? That's amazing.
So my goal is every day I will get up and get dressed still. What, don't tell me you get dressed every day of every weekend! I will make breakfast and then set to work on at least 1 project, preferably one that requires movement (today I've somewhat failed). After lunch I will spend the afternoon doing a sit down activity, and then my evenings will be whatever they would normally be.
This will keep me sane during this waiting game, no?
So far, the entire upstairs is clean (woohoo!!!!!). And after a lot of work, the main level is mostly clean too! We just need to basically sweep and do a few project organization things, and we're good. Next up- the downstairs. I'm mad excited here. My house, for probably the first time ever, is close to being completely clean!
I've also started to crochet. I already knit, but I was kind of getting bored with it. So I bought a set of crochet hooks and a book on how-to, and found some patterns on Ravelry, and set to work. We now have a newborn sized pumpkin hat (that is OMG adorable) and about 20 rows worth of a bib. :-D Hopefully by the end of things I'll have a few bibs, and a papoose. Unfortunately the yarn I bought for the papoose is not very crochetable. I can't see my stitches! So I'm going to have to see if I can find a knitting pattern. Because I want this papoose. And this yarn was semi expensive (hello soft and fluffy).
And in the mean time I'm totally getting my arms the workout they need. By throwing a miserable looking "hot dog" dog toy once every 10 seconds for my extremely happy puppy. He has spent a month learning to live at home all day by himself, and now all of a sudden Mama is home every day all day. Holyfreakincowhowmanytoyscanwefindforhertothrowtoday?
And fortunately by noon he's zonked. Like now. He's curled in a ball in my lap. Gotta love tiny dogs. So much energy that honestly runs out so fast.
I'll maybe get some cute pictures of the hat and soon-to-be bibs before long. I'm sure you're dying to see a newborn pumpkin hat, right? Me too... On the newborn, that is. Any day now.... Any day now.....
We gotta stop meeting like this. I'm such a better friend than that. And I do consider you my friend!
I have been lazy with pregnancy. And then third trimester hit and the laziness went away because, oh my god, we're having a baby soon and I need to get my shit together! But here's the thing- there is so much around me that got neglected, I'm still WAY behind! And holy wow, people. Third trimester is THE HARDEST to get things done. Ok, maybe I'm forgetting all the sickness and exhaustion of first, but... I'm going with it.
AND ON THAT NOTE!
Pregnancy news!
As of today I am 37 weeks 1 day. :) This means full term, people! We are all on baby lookout around here. Not that you really want to know, but I am 1 cm dialated, and the baby's head has dropped. This thing is for real.
And that also means that I have of course survived what I may have described as a hellacious gestational diabetes diagnosis and diet. I won't lie, it's been hard at times. Especially after the first few months when you start getting bored with what you eat. But for the most part, I'm enjoying the food I can actually eat, and I'm honestly trying to think of ways to incorporate this style of eating (which is super healthy) into my every day life post baby and post GD. It's really good for you. And it's really been my saving grace. I've only gained about 34 pounds, 30 of which I had gained BEFORE BEING DIAGNOSED. That means for the entire third trimester I have gained 4 pounds. Don't worry about the baby- he or she has been gaining in a very healthy way. At my 36 week appointment (and ultrasound... I get them weekly now thanks to the GD) they estimate the baby to weigh 6 lbs 2 oz.
But with all said and done, I have a list of foods that I will be eating post-baby. Included are spaghetti, a hot fudge cake from frisch's, and my birthday dinner, including cake. Oh, and eventually pumpkin pie. pumpkin muffins. and breakfast foods. I miss cereal and biscuits and french toast.
So that's the majority of the pregnancy stuff. More to come.
Books-
Apparently the last thing I read was the Song of the Lioness Quartet? That really can't be true, can it? I love to read. I read all the time. No way. I said I was going to read Harry Potter... Did I do that? I can't remember, but I honestly don't think so because I don't remember nearly as much as I would had I just read it... So I guess I need to read that (again). BUT to help me catch up on my reading (which I thought I was behind before... that's nothing now!!!) my wonderful husband got me the Kindle for my birthday. I'm so excited, and I have already downloaded several books. None of which I've finished yet, but I will soon! And happily I will be updating my 11K in 2011 list here shortly with the pregnancy book that I have read not once, but actually TWICE.
Work-
The main reason I have been so lazy! I thought the 4 months of training for the job was a little much and kind of overwhelming. BOY WAS I WRONG!!! So I guess they like me? Because they gave me a lot more work than expected... It was supposed to be temporary while someone was on leave. But then she came back, and never took back the work! I love it, though! My job is so much fun, and so interesting. Yes, I plan the production for our making systems. Yes, to some people that probably would be very boring. But my job is far from boring. There are issues every day, and the schedules are ALWAYS like putting together huge complicated and sometimes incorrectly cut puzzle pieces. Now that I'm finally adjusting (and have only 4 days before maternity leave) I can tell that the work has been a major cause behind my exhaustion. Not that pregnancy has been enough! It's gotten a lot easier on me now, though. I know my job better. I'm at that stage where I'm ready to learn the next step (believe me... I'm still on a basic level at work). But obviously with maternity leave starting in FOUR DAYS I'm not moving on until I return.
In other news-
My house is a wreck still. But it's majorly improved. Remember how I said I was lazy? This is where it's been the worst. I have finally gotten most of the upstairs cleaned up. Our bedroom is by far the easiest room to maintain in our house, and I've successfully done so now for over a month. :) The guest room is probably just as easy and I've been doing well with it too. I haven't gotten the office cleaned up, but I at least get in there and dust, vacuum, and clean the window every now and then. And of course the nursery. It's been well worked on! More on that later. The bathrooms have been more difficult to maintain. My husband is messiest in the bathroom, and it's honestly a crappy bathroom to begin with. It's definitely near the top of the major remodeling project lists.
The downstairs, however... is a disaster. I got the dining room cleaned up last week, though. And I got the fall decorations out- I just need curtains. I imagine I can keep it clean enough. My kitchen is still a mess, and I haven't even touched the living and family rooms. Both of which have been swallowed whole by books, fabric, papers, yarn, more papers, bags (and bags and bags) and shoes. Oh, and empty boxes from all of the baby stuff. But the living room is seriously on my hit list tomorrow. It's going down.
Mike, a job, and childcare-
So my wonderful hubs found a wonderful (and well paying) job!!!!!! It's full time (I could sing) with not only benefits (yay!) but AWESOME benefits (YAY!!!). So we are just thrilled around here. We're both working on the same shift now. That's a plus. We get our weekends together! And seriously. I haven't even looked back to the days where we didn't. How did we seriously manage that for so long? This is so nice.
And with his new job, and a rather long commute, we had to get rid of his car. It wasn't reliable. And definitely not functional as a family vehicle. So with the new job, and shiny new paycheck, we traded in the little coupe for a CR-V. :) We had been planning this purchase for a long while, I'll admit. Don't think we're rich or anything (we certainly aren't). But we knew we'd never be able to afford a car payment until Mike had a better income.
There are downsides to the new job, though. One of which is childcare. Our baby will be at a daycare center 40 hours a week. But it's literally down the street from my office, so I can go see him or her at lunch time if I wanted. And we found a daycare that I'm really excited about. They stress education. They start teaching them in classroom style ish at the age of 2. Geography, Music, Math, Science, and Writing. There may have been others too. I can't remember. They play too, though. And still have nap times. They were very organized, had lots of information and were real exciting people. The kids were all happy, and you could just tell. It was a good place.
The only other downside is our poor puppy is not used to us both being gone all day. I can tell he hates it. But we're trying to make sure he gets a walk in the evenings or at least something. And he needs to get used to less attention- a baby is coming after all. It's just sad to watch. He's adjusting well, though. No bad behavior. He really is a big sweetheart. You can't help but love him. I don't care what people say, I don't think my feelings towards him are going to change much after baby arrives.
Ok, so I've bombarded you with TONS of information tonight! I'm going to write another post on the nursery, and maybe if you're lucky I'll include a post on Puerto Rico (cuz who doesn't want to see THOSE pictures?). And maybe, just maybe, I'll get something read here soon and I'll update my reading challenge. I'm scared to look at the numbers, though... I was so close to caught up.
Oh hello. Remember me? I know I haven't been around much other than the few books here or there. It's been a busy time for me. I'll just give you one huge update, mmmk?
All things pregnancy
Pregnant life has not been a happy life for me. I'm trying my darndest, but it just seems that life refuses to be nice on this journey. (I really just have WAY too much going on). Anywho- I failed my glucose screening. And then I failed my glucose tolerance test. So I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes and told to take an education class (I did) and start testing my glucose levels 4 times (that's FOUR FINGER PRICKS) a day.
Ok, so I got the news in the middle of a rough week, and it's been pretty stressful, and I cried a lot. No lie. But it wasn't bad. The diet wasn't even that hard to follow, even though yeah- it sucks to give up your carbs. I like my carbs, especially in the morning. Cereal? Milk? Fruit? I can live without sweets. But cutting carbs wasn't easy. But I did it. And I was proud of myself!
Until my glucose levels rose again. The diet stopped working. So I talked to my OB, and she put me on an even stricter diet with a follow up this Friday. I started Friday evening. I cried. A lot. It's a really strict diet. I could probably name what I'm allowed to eat quicker than what I'm not allowed to eat. As in- eat at all, not just reduce intake. I'm allowed whole wheat bread (only 1 piece for breakfast). I'm allowed peas (at least she didn't say anything about them), apples, berries, milk (2 glasses a day, NOT at breakfast), greek yogurt, pears (again didn't say anything about them), oranges that aren't too sweet. And then I'm supposed to eat tons of protein and fiber. So leafy greens and meat it is! Good thing I'm still allowed peanut butter. I'd die without at least that.
But my numbers were down again! yay! Except today, but I think I know why at least. I didn't eat a good bedtime snack last night, so I started off rough. Then I had a protein bar instead of a real food for a snack, and I think it shot my numbers up... So no more of those I guess.
But all in all, everything is going well! We aren't finding out the gender (even though we've had 3 ultrasounds and the doc said we'll have another at 36 weeks). We have names picked out. We have done a lot of prepping, and when baby comes I'll do a nursery post (because it won't be finished until after we know baby's name). We have a good amount of cloth diapers. At least for at first.
Oh, and the stats- I'm 27 weeks. I've gained 27 pounds. The doc doesn't want me gaining any more and says with the restricted diet I probably won't. I'm not so sure about this... But what the hell, right?
In other news
I spent another 2 weeks in Puerto Rico (another reason for the blog hiatus). This trip was a lot more stressful. I had to go with a guy I'm not very fond of at work (and he's not very fond of me). It makes it difficult for a pregnant woman, especially when you need help. The work was also different. We weren't just learning about the plant- we were shadowing for our actual position and doing some real work. Plus, I used my Spanish a lot more. You wouldn't think it, but it takes a lot of energy to do that. I was exhausted!
Oh, I got to use my first aid training AND Spanish all at once! It was a horrific story but it's perfect for blogging. There we were in a traffic jam. On a 4 lane road with a 4 foot median (ish). When we get up to the front of traffic, there is a man lying in the road with a helmet on. Not moving much, and very much hurt. No motorcycle in sight (which to me, is bad...). So we stop for a second, and I immediately jump out to help (hello CPR/First Aid training!). I let someone who actually LIVES in Puerto Rico use my phone to call 911 and the guy's family while I spend the next 30 minutes keeping the guy calm and still. Lucky his helmet saved his head. His arm was destroyed, though. But very little blood, so at least I didn't have to worry about that, nor did I have to provide first aid for it. The guy's name was Alex, and for the rest of my life I'll never forget him. He probably had a concussion. Later his family texted me to say thanks and informed me that he had a broken arm (probably both the radius and ulna) and a broken leg. It was one of those moments where you just react, and then afterwards you really feel proud of yourself. My story-telling doesn't at all do it justice.
So... pregnant woman helping an injured motorcyclist... It had to be an interesting moment for everyone else too. And even if they are the craziest drivers I've ever seen (seriously), they certainly care for each other. No one in traffic cared about the pace. Several got out to help and make sure he was ok. It was very nice to see such a great culture.
And on that note I think I'll end right there.
{one} what is your favorite breakfast food?I don't normally like breakfast. But I love almost all breakfast foods. My favorite is normally french toast.
{two} how many pairs of shoes do you currently own?Maybe 12.
{three} city or country?City
{four} what is your favorite part of your job?I work with my mom!
{five} what is your favorite junk food to snack on?I don't normally snack on junk food.
{six} have you ever been mentioned in the newspaper?For honor roll, honors society, bowling (high school varsity), music
{seven} do you use post-it notes?All the time.
{eight} do you have freckles?No
{nine} is it okay for men to wear pink?I think it definitely looks good on some. Not on others.
{ten} when was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?Probably March of 2008
Linky LinkSince my computer is being dumb and I can't get the picture uploaded {one} ice: crushed or cubed?Cubed. But I actually prefer those plastic balls with the frozen water in them- I hate when my drink is watered out.
{two} what is your worst traffic pet peeve?People who tailgate. I am that driver who will hit my brakes and eventually slow down. In the fast lane. Yup.
{three} what room in your house best represents your personality?I'm thinking the living room. It may look plain, but it's full of books and while the table is a mess- it's an organized mess.
{four} do you save old birthday cards?I try to every now and then. I still have the last one my grandpa gave me before he died, along with the last one my uncle gave me before he died.
{five} when was the last time you went on a picnic?I remember a small "mac n cheese" type of picnic with Mike SEVERAL years ago (like... 4 maybe)
{six} do you regularly check your horoscope?No
{seven} when you’re home, what do you wear on your feet?Socks in the winter. Nothin' in the summer.
{eight} what’s your favorite gambling game? Slots. I like the ones with games on them.
{nine} have you ever written (or started writing) a book?No. I'm interested though.
{ten} what is your favorite musical?The Phantom of the Opera, for sure. Although to be fair I haven't seen West Side Story in a while, and Mike refuses to let me watch Rent (something about his roomates watching it all the time and now he hates it?)
{one} what was your favorite sitcom growing up?Full House
{two} what song always makes you happy when you hear it?Anything John Mayer
{three} do you still have your wisdom teeth?No I don't have my widom teeth, and no, I've never had them removed. I was born missing 7 teeth- 4 of which were of the wisdom type. Lucky? I like to think so.
{four} what is your go to way to relax?A book. A nap. Leaving the house.
{five} do you play any instruments?Piano, Flute (Piccolo) and Bass guitar
{six} nude beaches: yes or no?No. They are gross in reality- a bunch of older and bigger people that just aren't as attractive as what you see on tv (when is life ever like tv?)
{seven} do you chew your pens/pencils?I chew on my pen caps. But that's about it.
{eight} can you change the oil in your car?I have been known to work under the hood once in a while. I haven't changed the oil on my current car, but I did on the mustang and cavalier, so... yeah
{nine} can you curl your tongue?yep!
{ten} can you knit or crochet?I knit. I like to knit. I still have a Christmas present to finish, though. Better get on that. LoL
{one} how tall are you?5'3". I'm short, and I like it mostly.
{two} besides bills, what do you spend most of your money on?Skyline and books. It's a sad life, but someone's gotta do it. {three} what are your three favorite websites?Blogger, Yahoo, and probably www.ana-white.com which is this ultimately awesome do-it-yourself furniture building site. {four} what brand of tennis shoes do you prefer?I don't have one, but Reeboks and Sketchers are pretty nice. {five} what food can you absolutely not stand to eat?Anything spicy. No way.
{six} How many pairs of jeans do you own?4- 3 that fit and look nice, and 1 that look horrible but are covered in paint and count as my "work jeans" {seven} if you could have any job, what would it be?If I could have any job I would stay at home and not have any to be honest. {eight} have you ever ridden in an ambulance?My dad was an EMT, so riding to school in an ambulance was common. I also got hit in the face with a baseball bat once. Knocked out, placed on a backboard, rode in an ambulance, the works. {nine} how many pillows do you sleep with?2- Mine and Mike's. He works nights, people. No, I don't take it from him! {ten} on a scale of 1-5, how organized are you?5. I love organization. And since I forgot to post last week's- {one} name one thing you worry about running out of.Gas. I push it to the last minute because I hate taking the time to pump gas.
{two} what is your favorite pizza topping?Ham and Pineapple
{three} what is your favorite harrison ford movie?6 Days, 7 Nights or maybe Sabrina. Air Force One was pretty good too.
{four} apple juice or orange juice?orange juice.
{five} what’s your favorite thing to do on a sunday afternoon?Read.
{six} what is the wallpaper on your cellphone of?A piece of sheet metal with a heart on it
{seven} do you have a favorite tv commercial?No. They are all pretty dumb.
{eight} what is the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?I don't eat weird things. Although some would consider deer meat, squirrel, or frog legs to be weird I guess. It's all part of living on a farm.
{nine} what is one piece of clothing you can’t live without?Jeans. Gotta have my jeans.
{ten} if you were a character from “lost”, who would you be?I don't watch Lost.
{one} have you ever been on tv?Local tv, yes. In high school I was a member of the varsity bowling team. It may sound silly, but we were awesome and we were the first girls varsity team to be State Champions. In any sport! So we were on the news. Fun! {two} what was the best movie you saw last year?I would have to say Despicable Me. :)
{three} do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?Untucked. They are just too tight when they are tucked in.
{four} do you cut coupons?Yes, but not a lot. I save about $10 a week, though. That adds up to over $500 a year.
{five} do you ever count your steps when you walk?If I'm bored.
{six} what sauce do you dip your chicken nuggets in?Honey. Plain honey. It's the best. Been the best since I first discovered it was good on both nuggets and french fries.
{seven} do you have any magazine subscriptions?I got a free US subscription once, and although it ran out in November they still keep sending it to me. Weirdos.
{eight} when was the last time you wrote a letter on paper?March of 2008. It was addressed to my dad.
{nine} what’s your favorite fruit pie?Banana Pudding. That counts, right?
{ten} black olives or green olives?Neither. Gross.
Ladies and gentlemen!
I did it.
I signed up for a race. And not just any race (oh no, my first can't POSSIBLY be easy!). It's 2.91 miles of hell.
No, that's literally what the thing says. Hell. It's a 2.91 mile run, but that's not all.
We're talking 14 death traps. Some are fun. Like climbing the haybales and the junkyard. Others are still mild- crawl through a dark tunnel, the tire run, the uphill run. They get a little more difficult when you have to climb a wall, run through a wind storm, trudge through waist deep water. They get scarier when they make you repel down a cliff, walk a plank, run down a river. Some are rather difficult, like climbing the nets and crawling under barbed wire. But the scariest of all??? That terrifying one?
You have to take a leap of faith. Over a fire pit.
Yeah, about that.
T minus 150 days until I meet my death in a burning blaze. And the sad part is it's at the end of the race, meaning I will have run almost 2.91 miles and conquered 12 of the other obstacles. All that will be for naught when I go up in smoke.
But it'll be fun! Right...? Right?
Yeah. Totally.
PS- if you are in the area and care to join me on my suicide mission (along with about 5 or 6 of my friends), here's the link. We run at 9 am on June 5.
I just accepted a challenge to read 11,000 pages this year.
That's 11 bajilion thousand million pages!!!!! I don't know if I can do this, but as a student in a MLIS program, I think I'm up for it.
I'll blog my progress. Promise. And maybe a picture or two.
Let's see how I do, shall we? Any interesting reads on your list? I have a hefty few on my list. Atonement will be the first. I just finished The Five People You Meet in Heaven. Seriously, you should read it.
I'm not normally a person to make New Year's Resolutions, because quite frankly we usually don't keep them. BUT. This past year I noticed that I was just sorta going through life and getting really comfortable with routine and my every day life. (read: boring). SO this year I have 2 resolutions: to live life with more purpose, and to leave my comfort zone more often!
For example. I plan on signing up for the Warrior Dash today.
Also on the list this year?
Goals for us:
Mike wants a full time job. He's expecting a call for an interview in the next week.
I want to get a lot of grad school in (I start in 9 days).
Run the Warrior Dash (and some other 5k races).
Attend a wedding! My brother will have a May wedding. :)
Goals for the house:
We need to cut down a tree... Sadly...
If Mike gets that nice full time job we just might get new windows!
I want to re-do the master bedroom and the project room. We're thinking natural earthy tones in the bedroom and I like the idea of bright colors for the project room (since later it will eventually be a baby's room).
Hang a clothes line! We have a huge nice backyard. Time to make use of it!
Landscape- I want a garden in the front yard, and I hate our bushes!
Project list-
Window treatments for the bedroom
Bottle Chandelier
Laundry Organizer
Sewing Cart
Message Center at the door (Can't decide which one I like best)
Knit several projects and open an Etsy shop??? Or maybe just get my Christmas gifts done early. We'll see!
Happy 2011 y'all!
2010 leaves much to be desired, to be very honest. Personally I can say I have detested this horrible year, and I can't wait for it to be over. But I must admit- there has been a lot of growing and a lot of learning who my (and my husband's) true character is.
Here's a quick recap of the year, bloggy-wise and non-bloggy-wise.
January- We moved into our house!!!!!
February- Mike was unfortunately transferred from his "temporary" full time position to a "permanent" part time position. Blah, but I have to say it was expected. Either way it kind of put a damper on our economics.
March- A friend of mine actually moved in with us. Technically. She'd actually been living with us since January, but it was only temporary... until it became permanent.
April- I started my blog and told you all about our Wedded Bliss. I also learned that diamonds can indeed break.
May- I told you about our Mothers Day and then about learning to use Iphoto.
June- I told you our awesome news about making new traditions. I also discovered that I detest translating, but I love libraries.
July- I was mostly sick. But I learned I could endure several weeks of constant nausea.
August- I unfortunately shared the bad news. And then I lost my Grandpa. August is a really bad month in our family. But I learned my own strength, and that when needed I can survive just about anything.
September- I shared the things that made me happy. I discovered that getting away is not the same as running away. I witnessed the Running of the Weiners. I described Football in our house. And we remodeled our beautiful office.
October- I shared important shit- like what the freak are Fast Flats. And how to budget your money. And that thing about loving myself, which I indeed think I have learned. I also applied for Graduate school.
November- I began freezer cooking. Which I love, by the way. I also confessed my desperate need for a dayplanner. Oh, and did I mention? I made a freakin' turkey!!!!!!!
December- Mike turned a quarter of a century, and I am finally able to say that I have found what makes me happy. Oh, and I have registered for my first semester of grad school. :)
And by the power vested in me, and speaking for several others, I say "Goodbye 2010!!!! We've learned our lessons. Now it's time to move on. May we never see the likes of you again!"
{one} did you buy a christmas tree this year?Nope. Had our trusty fake one with lights and all!
{two} what is your favorite holiday tradition?Decorating the tree and picking out our yearly ornament. {three} do you open your gifts on christmas eve or christmas day?It varies. We open ours usually Christmas Day, but it's hard to tell when we'll see our family each year.
{four} at what age did you stop believing in santa claus?I don't remember how old, but I remember when it happened... I would say 7 or 8?
{five} do you fill stockings?No... We don't. But we will when there are kids around.
{six} handmade presents or store bought presents?From friends or For friends: Handmade. From mom/dad/hubs/etc: Store bought. For mom/dad/hubs/etc: Can go either way- depends on what they want!
{seven} do you have a favorite christmas meal?Mike and I are starting a new tradition- We are having Apple dumplings for breakfast, and maple glazed ham for dinner. YUM
{eight} is your christmas tree real or artificial?Fake. It's easier, and safer for the pets.
{nine} what is your favorite christmas song?I love Vince Gill and his daughter singing "Let There Be Peace On Earth"I also like Christina Aguilera's "Silent Night"
{ten} did you send out christmas cards this year?Working on it! We have 20 in the mail with about 20 more to make, only half of which need mailed... Too many friends and family, I swear!
I love Fridays. At least most of the time. I don't often speak of my work on here (because let's face it- who wants to hear about an accountant's work?) but today I think I will share one aspect of my job that (sometimes) makes me happy.
I am an accountant. I do the payroll, and as such, I'm in charge of the time monitoring system (the phone system we use to clock in and out). It's a basic system, you call a number, you punch in your id (I say your name), you hit 1 to clock in or 2 to clock out (it verifies that you "clocked in" or "clocked out"), you hang up.
In the process, if you screw up (forget, clock out when you meant to clock in, etc etc) you will get an automated message telling you to call the office (ME!). When you do, I fix the problem. If you don't, there could be dire consequences, but that's not what I'm hear to discuss.
Sometimes I get cute calls like this:
"Hi Lynzie. The lady" (an automated machine) "told me I screwed up this morning. Can you tell me what I did wrong?"
Or sometimes, when I fix things I get
"Thanks. You're the best." I've also heard "awesome" "the wo-man", "amazing"
And then there are the guys that think they are all cute
"Thank you hun" or "Thank you baby"
Normally those would bother me, but... It's usually one guy, and he has a disability of some sort, and he's trying to be cute, and he is.
Other happy moments- We have a few workers who are from a country in Africa. I don't know which country, but they have a REALLY HEAVY ACCENT. Do you know who they like to talk to? Me. They call me all the time with questions- sometimes questions I don't have the answers to. But you wanna know why they call me? They like me. They know I will help them without yelling at them or getting frustrated, and that makes me happy.
What makes you happy?
Happy Friday, y'all.
So maybe I hadn't mentioned it on here, but at one point Mike and I had everything pretty much figured out. We were gonna have a baby. Then in a year I'd go back to school. And it would just continue from there.
But then mother nature got in the way. And put a wrench in our finances. A major wrench, unfortunately. So we took a few months to recoup emotionally, and to take another look at our finances to think of a new plan.
We have finally made (and acted on) that decision. I am going back to school effective immediately (or as soon as I'm accepted). The baby will be added to the picture once we are more financially stable (again... good grief). This will be when Mike gets a full time job. As of right now he has 1 part time job. We would be doing well if he got a second, but then we'd be back to him never being home. Sucky, right? So we're waiting for a full time job.
NOT that it would be required. But given our financial situation, it would be.
Anyways, off my tangent- back to topic- I'm going back to school!!!!!
I have applied at Kent State University to obtain my masters in Library and Information Sciences. That's right, folks. I want to be a librarian. My career path was a hard choice for me. I've stewed for ages and ages. But I finally made the decision based on the fact that I can really get exactly what I want out of life in that specific career. I want to run a children's library. I would be around kids. I would be helping people (and working for a non-profit, which is really what I want). I can use my Spanish. And I'm sure, seeing as how a library is so family oriented, it would be a great place to work while having a family. (I must note that I have had the same career plan for 6 months now. WOOHOO! That's probably a record for me!)
I'm very excited about going back to school. I've missed it. I've missed having a lot to do and places to go and things to study. And I'll be working towards a career that I'm sure I'll love. AND I will be able to use my bachelor's degree, which has yet to really be done. Oh, and did I mention my cousin has been attending the same program for a year now? We'll be career-buddies!!!! :)
Yes, I'm very excited. And I feel the loans I'll need to accomplish this are going to be well worth it in the end. I can't wait!!!!
Have you visited The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans yet? Oh no? Well, I highly recommend it. They are fabulous women working on a project that we could probably all use a little more of- our health.
What the caha does that have to do with Wedded Wednesday? They posted a new challenge for the month of October. I've yet to agree to it, but I plan on it. Right now, actually.
The challenge is to love yourself. OH MY GOOD GRACIOUSNESS! That's asking a lot from me. That is NOT sarcasm my webby friends.
Still- What the double caha- I made it up, and I like it. It's meaningless, which means non-offensive -does that have to do with Wedded Wednesday?
My husband is a wonderful man. He truly is. He's pretty honest, too. But probably the most frustrating thing for him in our relationship- me. I can't take compliments. I hardly give them. I'm quick to find flaws and errors and problems without even noticing the blessings, the achievements, or the hard effort which is sometimes the whole point. I'm a very very very strong willed perfectionist. I used to see it as a good thing, but the older I get I'm starting to see that I might be wrong on that. Ironic, no?
Something I think a lot of people fail to see in successful relationships is the fact that each individual involved loves themselves. They have a healthy life because they care about their own interests/achievements/goals. This is NOT to say that they love themselves too much. That's possible. It's just that they realize they are just as deserving as the other of their own dreams, goals, interests, time, etc. It's extremely important in a relationship. Otherwise you have the problem that my husband and I sometimes have to face. So here's my huge confession and seriously- I recently told one of my best friends about this not more than a month ago......
I hate don't love myself.
Ok, really?.......... Maybe..... Hard to believe because I'm so freakin' awesome on my blog hahahaha!... I hide it well. Those closest to me probably know the truth i.e. my mom, my best friends- especially the one I talked to- and my loving husband. I have a hard time finding this so called middle ground. I don't like being hard on myself, and logically I know that I do a lot of things really well, and if I don't I honestly try my hardest or have good intentions. But if I'm nice to myself I feel that either a) I come off as conceited, selfish, egotistical, narcissistic, or just plain self-centered. How many of those words are redundant? or b) I feel like I just sacrificed something more important, like maybe doing something for myself replaced doing something nice for my husband, who deserves it more. And secretly, I really really really care what others think. Logically, I don't understand why the crap it even matters at all, but the fear of what others think is really a big problem for me. Why??? See? I think my own faults are logically, well... stupid and unjustified!
But I'm working on it. It's very difficult, though, because I see a lot of failures. I graduated last year and expected life to be more. I'm not even working with my degree. I don't honestly enjoy my job, but I can't change until after Mike is settled. I don't really even like my house. The result of having a desk job has added to a problem I NEVER had until recently- weight gain. I gained a good solid 20-25 pounds after leaving band and graduating. I obviously had the recent issue with pregnancy. I have time management issues. Ps I think the laundry buzzed and I forgot... Damn caha.
All of these- and they aren't all completely my fault -I really had a hard time saying that...- are things that I see as flaws. I nit-pick. I see all the problems. I have a hard time getting past them because I can't imagine life being ok, good, right without fixing all those little imperfections.
So here is my pledge. I'm telling you here and now. I'm going to change. I'm going to start loving myself. I am going to accept compliments. I am going to believe the compliments and stop finding excuses for why someone is giving them. I'm going to find one positive every time I see a negative. I am going to fail. I'm going to be ok with failing. I'm going to make a mistake and try not to cry laugh at it.
And also? I'm going to do the things that make me happy, and work on things to get me healthy again. But Lynzie, you are healthy! Actually... eh. Most laugh when I say I'm fat. I'm not, ok? I know. But I have some areas that I don't like, and I want to stay in the healthy weight range. Believe it or not, I'm actually very close to being overweight. I'm going to work on it. Not because I have to. Because I want to.
And the rest? I'll get there. But it's ok if it takes one, five, ten years to do so. Hell, Caha- I can still be having babies in 10 years, so I have plenty of time, right?
I'm so right. ;)
PS- After re-reading this post, I come off a lot harsher than I realized... While it's all true, I seriously think it sounds a lot worse than it is. I'm still sane enough to be happy. And I realize life isn't going to be perfect- hence the title of the blog. The general fact is life isn't perfect. It's the specifics that get me. And the first step- accepting my faulty perfectionism. Because it's ok to be a perfectionist. :)
